Song of Sickness

This was an attempt to express my feelings of desolation as I gradually lost more and more of my son to mental illness. Lying awake night after night with a stone in my stomach, I felt as though I was forgetting who he really was and that we might never, ever get him back…. Ross and I converted my poem into this song on holiday in France, immediately after his release from hospital. Occupational therapy – but for whom…

Song of Sickness

The music in you
It sang through me every day
Our feelings entwined
With the rhythms
That won’t go away

Your harmony found
Turned to discord in your head
Your beautiful sound
It was muted and then – dead

Sing a song of sickness
The scores upon your wall
Sing a song of sickness
You’re scrawling as you – fall

I feared I’d forget you
As your echoes fade away
Cacophonous voices they
Destroy your beat today

Your music had gone
As you scream instead
Lyrics have left you
As you de-compose your – head

I cling to the memory
Of your beat upon my heart
Your violent assault just reminds me
Of the gentleness you are

Awake in the night
Listening for a hint of song
Straining my ears the glimpse
Of a ghost of something – gone